10 Reasons Why Traveling Is a Terrible Idea

With the end of the year approaching, you probably have some vacation days saved up at work. Maybe you’re thinking of going away for the holidays, or maybe just to enrich yourself. Let me help you out before you start planning and spending your money and tell you that it’s just a bad idea. Traveling is stressful! Don’t add to your already stressful life and stay home. Here are some reasons why traveling is a terrible idea.

1. No One Speaks English.

How are you supposed to travel when no one speaks English? No one needs to learn another language in America. Our response to everyone who comes to America and doesn’t speak English is, “You’re in America, speak our language!” So don’t even bother planning a trip to Oktoberfest if you can’t speak German, or Carnivale in Venice if you can’t speak Italian, or the Greek Islands if you can’t speak Greek. It just won’t work. People in other parts of the world do learn other languages and just about everyone does speak English, but no one will talk to you in English. Do yourself a favor and just don’t travel.

2. You can see the same sights online or on TV.

With today’s technology, we have virtually everything at our finger tips. We can travel from Japan to Argentina in about 5 seconds. Want to see the Great Wall of China? Just check out this video. There’s no need to travel when you can see it all from the comfort your own couch. Who wants to sit in an uncomfortable airplane, knees all cramped up, paying for soda and snacks, sandwiched between a crying baby and a teenager listening to loud metal music? Seeing the world’s wonders online is better than seeing them in person. Save yourself the effort and avoid traveling.

3. Jet Lag is a Pain.

Sometimes, things are just too much of a hassle. Like jet lag. Ain’t no one got time for that! Going west is great because time just seems to stay the same, but going east, time just piles on top of itself and disappears making it feel like you time traveled forward. And people expect you to be on a normal time schedule after that? If we could just keep traveling west forever with no International Date Line, I’d say go for it. But since eventually you have to lose time and deal with that awful jet lag, just stay home.

4. Who Has the Time?

Here in the land of opportunity, we work hard to be successful. In fact, we work to live, and live to work. Going in early, leaving late; when did leaving on time become an act of courage? And with a schedule like that, when do you find time to travel? Just accept the inevitable: your fun time is over. But you have enough money to live in America, right? Money over fun – you win.

5. It’s Too Expensive.

Let’s face it: traveling is expensive. First, the plane flights are crazy expensive especially to go out of your own country. There are gas fees, border fees, passport fees, visa fees, airlines charge you for sodas or snacks now…don’t waste your hard-earned money. You work 18 hours a day for that cash – save it for when you’re too old to do anything with it! Even if you do decide to give it a try, you’ll probably run out of money between 5-star hotels, fancy dinners, and private cars.

6. You Can’t Travel Alone.

It’s dangerous, scary, and how would you go to a restaurant for dinner? Traveling alone is boring, lonely, and you wouldn’t see nearly as much as if you had a travel buddy. And who can find a travel buddy when it’s so time-consuming, expensive, and uncomfortable? You’d end up taking selfies because no one would be there to take pictures of you. You might even buy a selfie stick, something you can never get your reputation back from. It’s too much work trying to find someone to go with so it’s better to just not go at all. You’d probably end up sitting alone in your hotel room the entire trip anyway.

7. You’ll Probably Get Sick From the Food or Water.

You’re not used to different food. American restaurants like McDonald’s and Wendy’s use only the best ingredients, so anything outside of your local area just won’t match up to what your stomach is used to. The rest of the world isn’t as advanced as America, so they don’t have all the processed foods, meats with hormones and steroids, and vegetables with toxic sprays. And even though you drink bottled water at home, you’ll want to drink tap water abroad which obviously isn’t safe, so stick with what you’re used to. Your body will thank you.

8. You’ll Probably Get Lost.

There are things like old castles, palaces, mountains, deserts, underground tunnels, beaches, and canals that can get you all twisted around. You might get so lost that you never make it home. You might accidentally like life better somewhere else and unintentionally “lose” your ticket home. You can’t have that. Your 85-hour-a-week job is waiting for you to return with a pile of papers and thousands of emails.

9. You Have to Deal With Locals and New Customs

It really might be the worst thing ever to have to open your mind up to something new. You already learned everything you need to know and you know what gets you by in your hometown; please don’t learn anything else about some foreign exotic place. There’s not enough room in your memory for that. Plus, you might actually have to partake in these new customs like, dare I say, wine with every meal or siestas! No, heavens, no. You can’t drink at lunch then take a nap in the middle of the day. There’s work to be done.

10. Why Do Today What You Can Put Off Until Tomorrow?

A procrastinator’s dream. There’s always tomorrow! And it’s true, there’s plenty of time. You probably have so much to do today or this week or this month; actually, just wait until you get everything done. In fact, it’s probably just better to wait until retirement because by then you’ll be in great health, have lots of travel companions who are also retired, have so much money saved up, and have all the time in the world. It must be a good plan if everyone is waiting until retirement to travel.

There are so many reasons not to travel. I’m not even sure why people encourage it. There are more good things that come from sitting on the couch and surfing the Internet than actually getting on a dirty plane and paying an arm and a leg to get jet-lagged. You already know what the right answer is to this question: “Should I go somewhere exciting and exotic this year?”

Have any other reasons why traveling is a terrible idea? Put them in the comments below so I can update them into my post!

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